Just 5 more days of school. I must hang in there.

Went back to school today to complete my assignments. Obviously not done so my group's gonna meet up tomorrow again.

The weather was so shiok today it felt so good. Gosh. Went to have dinner with Jingwen and we ended up having a heart to heart talk for 3 FREAKING HOURS. Sit until backside pain. Heart also pain when we were talking about something that I've accumulated in my heart for so long. I realised we always have h2h before the end of a semester. The last time we had such a long talk was at Starbucks LOL. Totally remembered how I cried so much AT FREAKING STARBUCKS. -So embarassing gonna hide my head under the table like an ostrich-

I really dislike people whom I put 1st place in my heart, puts me 2nd in theirs. Maybe not even 2nd. Maybe like 5th or 6th. It hits me so bad. How I always let people into my lives and then get slapped on my own face for letting people in. Friends who left me, friends who backstabbed me, friends who put boyfriends infront of me, friends who made me think they were my besties when obviously they're not. I've been through it all. I remember there was this period of time where I used to block everyone out of my lives so I wouldn't need to risk myself for getting hurt. I was tired of people leaving me. I hated how I was the only one who felt the pain because others had more important friends to hold onto. I used to give every single one of my 'important' friends gifts during their birthdays and during christmas. I would personally choose their gifts because they meant that much to me. But did they do the same? No. So I stopped. My parents would always tell me that I shouldn't put friends first priority because they don't put me first yet I don't listen. I feel like people think I'll always be there for them. People don't feel like they will lose me. & I hate it. So let me tell all of you who really just don't treat me like i'm important. When I'm really outta your lives and you wonder why, just look back and think about how you've treated me all this time. There's your answer.

Another point. Texting people. I don't see what's so hard to reply one bloody message. It irritates me so much no amount of words could describe my annoyance towards people who DON'T reply to my message. The fact that I even text someone FIRST is just like wtf you're definitely an important person in my life. But no obviously i'm not important enough for the person to reply to me. The worst thing is that the person CHOOSES who he/she wants to reply. LIKE WHAT THE FUCK JUST REPLY TO ALL WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM. I try to give you benefit of a doubt. I always think of something positive to tell myself so I wouldn't feel upset when people don't reply. I feel like you're taking advantage of it man. Just because I know you don't always read your messages doesn't mean you can choose not to reply me okay. It's so annoying. I'm not even saying like you should reply on the spot. At least out of courtesy say 'thankyou' when I send you good regards right. ISN'T THAT JUST POLITE?! Do you think I text you because I wanna exercise my thumbs!? Stupid people always making me feel like I'm such a pest or big fat bother. Like ok fine maybe that's a sign I should get out of everyone's lives -_-

I really don't wanna do things first anymore man. If you bother, you'll find me. End of story. I hate going to people who doesn't even want me in their lives. SICK OF IT SICKKKKK!!!!!! Argh so fucking annoying

Been listening to this song since yesterday night. This is so emotional I can't even explain this feeling. It's not even a new song. She sings it with so much emotions I just can't stop getting emotional lol. If I could choose my sex, I would really wanna be a male. & I make sure I'm a good man.