Bullshit talent

Apparently me and Andrea were early for school today. First 2 lessons at Jitterbugs. Went there and jitterbugs wasnt even opened yet. Most of my mates were sitting outside waiting for it to open. I heard Edem humming to Jay chou's 聽媽媽的話. At first i thought he was listening to a indo version of that song. BUT NO it was Chinese! Oh my he listens to chinese song! Hahaha what a cute guy really.

 

Body conditioning and hiphop for the first two lessons. Learnt popping and wave today. It's tough :( BUT its fun~ Haha. Had a graded exam on the previous choreography she taught us. Sigh she didnt tell us our grades.... I really hope i dont get anything below B :( She's gonna teach us a popping choreography next week and that'd be our next graded exam. The more i see her, the more she reminds me of Rino. Haha.

 

Ate popeyes for lunch. Went back to school after that. Checked whether i paid for my school fees already or not. I was so afraid i haven't paid and today was the due date. My mother is such a blur queen too. Thank god i did~ Bumped into Shafiq, Afiq and Issac outside block F. Our next lesson was super boring. Only 1/4 of the class was interesting cuz of the lights/songs played. Most of the time, my ears were seriously tortured by this old man lecturer who couldnt speak english properly AT ALL. His english was so bad to the extent that the other guy, a technical theater student that doesnt speak english well, sounded like his english was so good. Most of the time he's laughing at his own "jokes" and i really had to strain my ear to understand what he was trying to say.

 

After that class ended, went to bathe. Walked to get gongcha with the others and then to the foodcourt. Dilly dally here and there. Andrea and I decided to go back to Lasalle. While we were walking back, Andrea went to throw something so i followed her. At that moment, Shafiq andd Afiq came up to me and succeeded in scaring me. It seriously gave me a mini heart attack. LOL! They still can laugh so happily ah.

 

We couldnt use the studio yet because some other people were using. I was really feeling damn warm. Needed aircon so badly haha. Performance project was still as boring and that i don't need to say anything. Went to watch this Diki Barat performance done by the Dip 2s of Performance, Dance and Acting. It was AMAZING!!! I was so amazed by them seriously. :( Seeing people perform really makes me miss performing so much. When will we get to perform too? :(

 

Supposed to have dinner with the whole big group after that. But as usual they were wasting their time hanging around and didnt wanna move. Extremely big groups really drives me mad. We ended up splitting into two groups because some of them went to the food court to eat. Shafiq Jingwen Afiq Andrea me and Cher went to Burger King. Well only shafiq and afiq bought food. The rest of us were still very full. Headed back to D201 and slacked.

 

So we all just sat there and most of the talkative ones were obviously talking. Afiq was like saying something like Andrea's his sister, Jingwen's his bitching partner, Cher's his ite idk what and then when he came to me, he was like ".......... er she's just there for me. hahahahaha" THIS IS HOW IMPACTFUL I AM TO PEOPLE'S LIFE. There's nothing i did that is able to make him remember me. This kind of thing really makes me sad. I don't wanna be the ninja. I don't wanna be the quiet one with nothing to say. I wanna say things but nothing's coming out of my mouth. I feel like i'm so intimidated by the people around me. All so humorous and loud and LOUD. What the heck.

 

Awhile later, most of the people started dancing around the studio. I still couldnt find any mood to get up and move. Only me and shafiq and Issac's gf were sitting on the floor doing nothing. I realised Shafiq's mood was changing. He looked so sad and isolated and i didnt know how to brighten things up. FUUUUUUUUU just hate myself. If i was anybody else in my class, I would have went to pound on him and make some noise to brighten things up. Lol that's how sociable everyone in my class are. Pathetic shit what am i. He left the room after awhile and at that point of time i knew i was right about his sadness and stuff.

 

Talentless friday night. I'm just there to see good dancers dance like there's no tomorrow, and good singers sing like there's no tomorrow. There's nothing i can show. Anything i can do, others can do too. What's so special about me. It's annoying. Annoying how i'm so common. A common mother fucking bitch.

 

Reached home at about 11.30pm. Bathed and i'm currently writing this post. It's already 1am... I was still thinking of watching a movie before heading to bed but all of a sudden i'm feeling so tired. I'm so tired la. If i gotta worry about how I have impacted other people's lives everyday, i think by the end of this semester I will look 10 years older, seriously. Why am i even bothered about such things. Sigh going out in big groups just makes me feel weiocmejlsldjxmcknsm. Life's so hard. Why am i not fun and hyper all the time. WHY fuck. Need to get over this. I think i don't have enough sleep really. It's gonna be a packed weekend ahead. Goodnight...  

 

 Omg this photo looks damn weird cuz i dont have a body.