SERIOUSLY DAMN ANNOYED WITH MY LIFE FUCK THIS SHIT K.

So someone stole my wallet at Winstedt today. MY FUCKING WALLET WAS STOLEN K. I didn't even know how to respond. My brain was just blank and I didn't even know who to tell. I told Toby and he was just talking to me and I JUST COULDN'T CATCH ANYTHING HE WAS SAYING. Not because of his NZ accent but because my mind was just in a mess. He handed me $50 and kept saying sorry and I didn't know how to respond to that situation like what!?! Why was he even apologising.... Why did he give me 50 and why did I just accept without even thinking omg?! Argh fuck

I went to tell Jazreel and Jonas and everyone else that plans were cancelled tonight. I was so fucking on for Mansion tonight k. You had no idea. I looked forward to it the whole fucking week since Sunday and this happened. I can't even. My phone was left with 20 percent and I used that battery to freaking apologise that plans were gonna be cancelled. Instead of spending my time worrying for myself and the shit that I've got myself into, I spent it worrying about everyone else. Wtf I really don't understand myself sometimes. I was thankful to the people who understood me and asked about my wallet. Out of everyone that I told, the person that I expected to care the most was the one who put me through the worse peer pressure ever. I can't even believe it. I can't understand how she couldn't even understand that I was not even in the mood anymore. I wouldn't risk my parents' trust on me just for one fucking night. She kept insisting and insisting and I'M LIKE WTF THIS IS ENOUGH IT'S NOT LIKE I WANTED THIS SHIT TO HAPPEN. Even when I'm left with 10% I was still trying to make things right with her but no. She just had to make me so mad.

Argh I hate losing my wallet. I hate it :'( I just leave too much stuff inside that means something to me. I loved that wallet so much :'( This feels even worse because I DIDN'T LOSE IT MYSELF SOMEONE STOLE IT AWAY. Fuck I hope karma strikes you back WHOEVER YOU ARE. Making a new god damn IC is $300 bloody dollars now. Because i lost it once. Can someone kill me now. Just kill me.

My back's just gonna keep getting worse everyday. I don't even know what to say anymore. Like I'm not even kidding when I say it hurts like CRAZY. I can't even do simple back arches without feeling the pain. Coach Ling did the crazy fast bridge thingy again and it hurt so bad WHY DID I STILL DO IT?!?!? -_- Wtf man. I'm really retarded sometimes I can't even.

After losing the stupid wallet, I used Toby's $50 to eat dinner with Jingwen and Andrea and cab home. I hate the person I've become k but at the same time I just need these kind of distractions in my life to keep me away from thinking about school and people in school. I don't know if I'm blocking it out right. I just don't know what I'm doing anymore. I miss everything in December k just fucking give me back my December life. Bring me back to Europe. JUST GIVE ME BACK MY HAPPY DAYS T_T

You know what I know my posts are always so irritating and whiny and sad but that's because it's my way of ranting. So if y'all don't like it I never ever asked you to read. Don't judge me just because I fucking have nowhere else to rant to but here.

Meh I'm damn tired from school now. It's the weekends I'm so sad I'm not going out tonight after all these drama but at the same time..... THANK GOD IT'S FRIDAY!!!!!! REST MY BACK REST MY SHOULDER REST MY NECK. EAT FAT FOOD. WATCH MOVIES AND CUDDLE WITH MYSELF. Goodnight bitches x