Tomorrow's the first day of school. Finally? I don't even feel excited. Because the area is sooooooo secluded. I don't even know where are the good spots to chill. What do I do during long hours of breaks? I feel like I'm too lazy to socialise.

How did the weekends flew so fast?

We fought over terrible miscommunication on Friday night. I spent the whole day looking at him sleep. That wasn't really a problem to me honestly. Because I know he was damn tired. So when I reached back home I just thought like since he slept the whole day maybe now he's a little awake? That's what I thought it was. I kinda was a little tired when I got home. But I kinda just didn't wanna sleep? I just wanted to talk to him I just felt like even though I was with him the entire day it kinda felt like I wasn't. But he kept rushing me to bathe so he could sleep. At least that was how it seemed like to me. So at that point of time I was not happy with the fact that he wouldn't like try and spare maybe just half an hour to chit chat a little?

After I bathed I wanted to sleep. But he took the initiative to stay up a little longer even though he was so tired already so after talking awhile I felt less sad. Then when we were about to say goodnight all the crazy misunderstandings miscommunications started to happen. Maybe because he was so damn tired he just got so confused with what I was saying. He misunderstood me to the max and we just flared. I get very scared when he starts treating my words like I'm nagging or talking too much. Because that's when I have no idea whether I should stop talking? Or just continue talking. It's so hard to not make him angry when he's at that state it's like everything I say it's just gonna make everything worse no matter what.

After some time he decided to just call me because he was constantly reading my messages wrongly and all. I don't know how I don't know what miracle happened.... But he managed to tell me how he felt. It was so hurtful in a certain way but it gave me room to explain what it is not what he is thinking at all. If he didn't tell me how he felt, I wouldn't have known that I was giving such vibes to him and he would just continue feeling miserable about it.. I love such talks with him. I really love to hear him say things. But it's so rare and it's really the only way for us to not fight. For him to tell me how he feel. I really want to know his heart. For me, it takes sooooo much courage to say what I want to say. So much. That's why I always end up in tears because anything that has to do with heartfelt words, it's just so hard to say.

I wish for us to communicate more... It's really the only thing for us to feel closer to each other, for us to understand each other better. We can do it, right?