I wrote a quite alot to post yesterday. And then I decided not to.

Today I have a lot to say and yet I just can't seem to find the right words. And I feel empty. Right now I feel empty. It's been a nice day out before we fought but now I just feel so distracted over everything all over again. I hate how a small tiny mistake made can just bring back all the bad things that have happened. I feel like I've reached danger zone all over and it might have been a small mistake but to me it hurts x10000000. Cuz the fear of bad shit happening never fails to return to my mind. Hais I don't even know can he be here at this moment to hug me right now?

Obviously no i'm dreaming.

Hur I feel like crying maybe i should head to bed