When something falls apart in my life, I can't seem to do anything else rather than focused on getting that something fixed. And yet others can just carry on with their life like everything is okay. I spent the past hour hoping for a miracle to happen. But no. I met another horrible driver than thinks he knows it all. I am now right here stuck on so many assignments but how the fuck am I supposed to concentrate when I have other things to think about? I hate that no matter how much I want to prioritise work first, it never happens. And through it all, I can still be doubted of the love I give to this man.

When I'm annoyed I don't expect someone to annoy me even further and expect me to smile and not get annoyed. Is that so hard to understand? Such a bad day with 2 nightmares in a row and following up with this. This is so horrible. While I sleep I cry. When I'm awake I cry too. What's the fucking point of living seriously. I hate that I'm feeling like that. I literally drop everything and just focus on the one thing that bothers me so much.

I hate feelings. I wish I was a mother fucking jerk. Who doesn't commit to anything. And goes around breaking hearts. Instead of being the heart-brokened one.

But I'll not forget that the past 2 weeks has been pleasant. It at least had more pleasant moments. & I'm thankful.