SAVE ME WHAT KIND OF AN ARTICLE IS THIS THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE. THIS IS SO FUCKING TRUE. Well..... If you went back to my late July or August posts... You might be able to find SOME relations to what I'm about to blog but... yeah oh wells. It is titled "No matter what we tell ourselves, it's never just sex."

"Regardless of how many people I have told or the ways I have made light of it, I am not proud of this. I make fun of my decisions and admit to my faults because then maybe it won’t seem as bad as it actually is. Who wants to be used for their body? Who enjoys waking up next to someone that they barely know, not fully remembering what happened the night before?

I hated thinking about this incident because it made me cringe, so I had never really looked at it this way. Ever since I had shared this story with her, I couldn’t stop thinking about what had really happened and why I had let it happen to me. I also began to think about all of the other physical experiences I had with guys and how I have been treated. I then realized that most of the guys I had been with had manipulated me into allowing them to use me without me even realizing it.

I was numb because I had let so many guys disrespect me in the past, and because I didn’t respect myself. I blamed myself, and I was disgusted with what had happened; but I did not put him at fault, not until months later. I look back on this scarring event and think that I should have had a drastic life change after this, but that’s not what happened at all." 

This sucks man I swear. Like why I do this LOL I'm so retarded sometimes but heck I just do it anyways. So full of shit shan.