I actually have a lot to blog about... But my bloody computer is down and I'm so lazy to type everything out on my phone... (Say only later end up the post long like hell hahahah)

Been sick for soooo many days. I'm feeling so many emotions for the past few days it's really driving me crazy. Had a bad fight with baby during Valentine's.... It was so bad it really fucked up my heart. Wells it's over now and we kinda had fun on Sunday. Every moment with him is so precious I can't believed I used up my Saturday to fight with him... :'( 

School's really demoralizing me to the max. I hate to say this but I've started the school term with no motivation at all. Here and there it'll come but it'll go as fast as it disappears. I don't even know why I still go. I really should've quitted in year 1 or latest year 2. Why did I wait till now.... I'm just very confused with my life right now. I really don't know what I want to do.

Everyone's either kicking me out or like giving me fucking bad spots or I'm second casted..... Like ok why not I just don't do the show at all? I remember how she previously said like "do yall think your presence is not important in the class?" YUP. Def not important. Whether I'm there or not it doesn't fucking matter. 

So Melissa decided to take me out half of Jenny's piece. Wow thanks a lot. She's really out to get me either out of the show or just maybe repeat the year. I feel so sad and at the same time I see how Jenny keeps trying to help me when she "attacks" me. I am fucking sick!!!! I am not kidding when I say i can't breathe properly!!!! Fucccccck whatever seriously. Everything's making me feel so fucked up. 

Shouyi's rehearsal was not that bad... Until the end when someone decided to just be fucking bipolar and shit. I was just voicing out what my problem was. That bitch had to raise her voice and be so mother fucking defensive and shit? I can never understand how I'm bigger size than her but her power is that of a man's. No wonder you no need penis to satisfy yourself. Omg I swear seriously I got no comments for her. But whatever 大人不跟小人计较. Not worth my time arguing with that bitch. You wanna fight with me? Nah I think you find a wall to fight with ok. 

I hate my blocking in hip hop..... I hate it so fucking much.. I don't know I can't help but feel like it's because I wasn't there on that day and so he decided to just throw me on corner. IM JUST SO SAD OK 😭.... Don't even need to talk about jazz I fucking hate the piece so much. Why am I a fucking powerpuff girl.... Can teachers make me do something I actually look good in for once....? HOW AM I CUTE DAPHENY TELL ME I LOOK SO RETARDED.... Why does she last minute throw all the steps to us... Oh my god GIVING UP ON LIFE 

Fuck school, fuck the toxic people. Fucccccccck I just can't do this anymore. Someone or something please let me see a ray of hope infront of me.