No point keeping my feelings in anymore. I'm not gonna rant to my friends no more no more ranting to my boyfriend either I'm just gonna post all this shit and let my anger out BECAUSE I'M HELLA ANGRY AND NO I MEAN EVERYTHING I SAY. None of these are ANGER WORDS I MEAN EVERYTHING.

I hate them I fucking hate them. I fucking want them to see a god damn counsellor and know what fucked up parents they are. They claim they do things for my own good. But please I have my own rights to have my own thinking. Do not force your thinkings on me. They always ask me who my idols are or who do I look up to. DEFINITELY not them.

I hate how they treat me. I hate how they always make me feel like I'm always doing the bad thing. I'm the worst daughter in the world. Yet they can always blame me saying that I victimise myself. If i've been feeling like this my entire life, can they go and fucking question themselves as to why I'm feeling like this?!!!!????? 

I'm gonna be fucking real here. I'm gonna be 21 soon. Yes they sponsor my studies. But that's all there is. Why do they wanna make bad blood against us and make it sound like they are my sponsor and I'm the one that needs to pay them back? Not happy don't do la. I hate how they go about things. They also always victimised themselves. Forever saying what their intentions are good and shit like that. Seriously I have my own eyes who's good and who's bad what kind of a person they are I know thoroughly. I choose to distance myself away from them because they are the people who're so cunning and dangerous. What kind of fucked up mentality and mindset they have I CANT FUCKING UNDERSTAND. Just because I'm their daughter I have to be forced to say whatever they do is right?! If they did a crime I WILL NOT HIDE IT. If they break the law they will pay for it. Doesn't mean I'm their daughter means I have to hide their wrongdoings. Its just an example. Just trying to say they need to stop controlling how i live my life. This stupid mother just say it like I never ever think about them and shit like that. Does she have any idea what she's talking about? 

She thinks her precious son is growing up to be like what she wants her child to grow up to be. But think again. He's slowing rebelling against you because why? Obviously something is wrong with you and he's just trying to be nice and still go by your wishes. Just wait for a few more years. You've already done wrong teaching me how to grow up. Yet you still do the same to the younger one. Seriously never learn. I can't be bothered anymore. It takes two hands to clap. 

Think about why I don't feel loved. Think about why I am always talking about myself. Because IT'S DAMN ABOUT TIME I ONLY THINK ABOUT MYSELF AND NOT YALL. How many fucking times I gave in to your nonsensical orders?! And when it's just once like asking to stay out late and shit you just change the whole thing and say like OH YOU NEVER EVER THINK ABOUT US WE WAKE UP WHAT TIME YOU WAKE UP WHAT TIME. You can afford to but we can't. FUCKING BULLSHIT. You mean after 25 after 30 you're still gonna wait till I come back home?! LET ME HAVE A FUCKING LIFE AND LEAVE ME ALONE. I'm so fucking annoyed by them. LIKE SO DAMN ANNOYED. I am sure as hell gonna walk out on them if they continue their fuckery. 

I'm so so so fucking sick of them always ONLY CLAIMING THEY THINKING ABOUT ME. But it's just all bullshit. They don't OWN MY LIFE. I'M A FUCKING ADULT THIS YEAR THE LAW DOESN'T CARE IF YOU'VE BROUGHT ME UP WELL OR NOT. Adult means I have legal rights to do my own shit and it's not of your damn business. I'm so nice to always come back before your ridiculous curfew timing and yet for a few times I can't get over it by not starting an argument with them. It's just ridiculous. When you're not happy you get to shoot whatever unhappiness you have towards us. But when it's us you just say like OH you never ever think about us. WHO'S THE ONE VICTIMISING THEMSELVES. Pot calling the kettle black. Whatever I am now, whether you like it or not, you caused it. SO LIVE WITH IT BITCH. I'm done with your fuckery. Done trying to talk terms with you. Because if you haven't noticed, I CAN'T BE BOTHERED ARGUING FOR MY RIGHTS. I HOPE YOU'RE FUCKING HAPPY, CUZ I WON'T EVEN TALK TO YOU NO MORE. 

I'll do things my own way from now. I'm done thinking for y'all and getting nothing back. If you wanna continue thinking like OH she doesn't give a fuck about her parents, so be it. I don't mind living with that. As long as I have no drama in my life with y'all I'm good. 

Dear Shanette Congratulations! Your application to study the Bachelor of Psychological Science Program at JCU Singapore has been successful.

To see this appear in my inbox the moment I wake up yesterday morning was a god damn relief. My whole january has been living in fear of how my life will turn out in 2016. Pretty damn tired of not doing everyday at home, having weird ass dreams that makes me scared of how my future days will turn out. MEH It's over. Right now my next step is to get a part time job. Best if Lola accepts me in.  That'll be like the best job ever because its just freaking outside my house HAHAHAH

Liqian's gonna be my roommate for the next week. And I've been enjoying her company since~ Have been talking for 3-4 hours straight about life with her yesterday and it just reminded me how lucky I am to have found an awesome friend like her. I do not need to fear that she judges me for anything. I do not need to filter anything. LITERALLY ANYTHING. We were totally reminiscing our 2014 rebellious days and what stupid choices we made in the past. The thing about us is, we can differentiate whats right and whats wrong. We just decided to be rebellious only because we wanted to, not because we are the kind of people we used to portray ourselves as. I'm so happy to have grown up with her. Seeing all my close friends grow up together it makes me so happy and blissful. I was looking back at how we were in Secondary school and how we are now. Liqian has always been the miracle of our clique and probably still is.

To know that her family background is so not good at all and she's doing so well in her life makes me feel so proud and happy for her. All her setbacks she deal with it herself. It's just so rare to find someone that's so amazing really. I love that she's the kind of friend that lingers around even when we don't talk for a few weeks. I LOVE YOU MS LOW

I miss Mr ong. I can't wait for next week to pass. Just hoping maybe just maybe Feb will be a less busy month. I don't know I hope we can work something out so there's more time for each other. Oh wells learning to be contented that at least this week is way better than last week. Still am pretty shaky but it's working out. A short one day with him this coming weekend. Wonder how I dealt with it everytime. I think it gets harder each time because I just get more attached to him in a sense?

Right now, just trying to remember the good times together to get me through the week.

Not feeling so good right now because I just hate this house. I just hate the vibes this house gives me. Sucks. Suckkkkkkkssssssss. Gotta survive through just one more month then I'll have angbao money and allowance. I wanna see 4 digits again in my account sobs this is pretty damn depressing but ohwells. Just ohwells

I miss you.

Have a cup of positivitea

The world seriously fucked up

Someone explain to me how someone can simply just break off with someone and the next instant be with someone else?!?!?! It wasn't like your relationship was so short or like superficial or whatever.. How does one do it?! It makes me so scared to know how many people can simply jump ships so easily. I can never do that shit.

I like freaking just want dylan my entire life and I don't want nobody else omg

They always say the grass is always greener on the other side. But nooooooo i will not let anyone psycho me into thinking the other side is greener. Because truthfully it will always be that way. There will always be better people out there. There are millions of pretty thoughtful girls that I am incompetent of. Same goes for the guys out there. Regardless of how "perfect" you think someone is, there will always be flaws that you'll not see in the beginning of the relationship. I cannot emphasise on how much it's a choice to be with somebody. It's never about falling for someone. Yes it is in the beginning but after awhile it's a choice. Whether you think he/she is worth the pain, worth the sufferings.

I've grown attached to dylan and without him in my life is just simply saying a part of me has died. I always choose to hold on because I will never focus on the current situation itself. That's just an obstacle that is trying to ruin the relationship. I will never choose to make a decision that I will regret for the rest of my life. I want him and I want to make things work regardless. I hope he feels the same way towards me. Cuz if he does it'll be us against the world. Nothing will tear us apart and really we'll make it till the end.

Attempting to change my point of view in things and hopefully I'll be a more brighter person in time to come.

GOD BLESS MEEEEEEEE

My eyelids and my side mouth seems to have some sort of an allergic reaction that I have no clue about. Skin so dry put so much lotion also no use meh..... 

It's been such a sad week oh my god it's over it's overrrrrrr. I thought I was sad alone. Turns out to be wrong. I knew it I knew I couldn't possible just feel so distant out of nowhere. Suddenly I just feel like he's so far away. It's impossible to suddenly feel like that. 

I can't explain the scariness of the thought that everything became back to square 1. In just a span of 2 days i felt like everything went back to square 1. Hais so hurting how.. I don't geddit I know he doesn't mean it but how come he can say it out when he's angry. It means he has definitely thought about it and when he's angry he vents it out.. 

Am I such a bad girlfriend 

Am I so annoying that he's getting so frustrated with me 

Should I not care....? :( 

I got chased out of the house on Friday 

I was asked to leave him alone for the next few weeks.... 

He really said he was feeling super 不耐烦 already and asked me to stop talking 

He said I act kelian and all 

Oh my god sobs I can't get this shit outta my head.. Suddenly feel the need to filter things I want to say to him all over again 😭 If I say none of that hurt it'd be a lie 

All the more I miss my last 2 weeks with him.. It wasn't perfect but I knew if we had a short argument things will still turn out fine.. How come now I'm back to being afraid of what's gonna come next.. :'( Sobs I shouldn't dwell on it but... Please can something good happen :'( 

救命。。我想我的男朋友想到快要疯了。。

I really thought I can do it though. But it's been like the 3rd night that I can't go to bed. I kinda wish I can visit him. I wish I had some sort of ways to visit him :( But noooooooo what should I do I feel like crying now. 

Trying to go dance everyday to like distract myself a little but it's not really helping because I'll spend the whole afternoon by myself. Like what the hell what can I do in the afternoon to keep myself busy someone tell me. I feel so empty with long conversations with him I feel so empty because his presence is just not there not even thru texts :'( I miss him

Why do I always attempt to stay strong but always fail.. sobs I need a hug right now 

Can the uni freaking get back to me already.... Day pass day I'm going crazy :( Boohoos sob sob 

After reading many long mushy dedications people write to their other halves, I have decided that in year 2016, I shall NOT do such stuff on my social media and make people vomit. I feel disgusted. LOL never thought that day would come from me, because I love writing long dedications and showing off how I really feel on my social media. I guess not anymore. And I don't consider my blog social media because barely anyone reads it and if you do, I DID NOT PROMOTE MYSELF. So yea. (Though I'm kinda really jealous when those boyfriends who're in camp and they still make an effort to write love letters to their girlfriends.................... wheres mine................)

I really miss dancing so much... I really need to resume dancing asap... I lost all my self confidence I guess also because I've stopped dancing for so long. I miss my dancer friends... I miss walking around ANYWHERE on the streets and just dancing around and not feeling like it's abnormal... I MISS IT. Kinda wished it was still my daily routine. Argh why can't life be balanced :(

Dylan finally booking in. Feeling so bitter about it. Its so crazy seriously. I spent almost 20 days with him straight and actually I feel like its too much to see each other everyday. But then when it's time for him to leave and go back to our daily lives with him booking in every Sunday, it simply just makes me feel bitter. :'( 

How should I deal with this man honestly. 

Every couple has their own individual lives to deal with, problems and all. I do agree there are many moments I wanna punch him in da face cuz he's so annoying but when I think back all i wanna do is squish him like a marshmallow. It's the moments away from him that makes me realise how much of a darling he is to me. It's been 1 year 1 month and if I include dating months it'd be 1 year 4 months. In this 16 months I always felt like if one day you left me I'd be so fucking sad I can't even continue my life, as exaggerating as that sounds. Maybe it's just me, maybe because I notice you too much, but I think about all sorts of possibilities.

The thought of you embracing another girl, loving another girl, or just showering your care and concern towards another girl makes me really sick. Just the thought of it. Everytime I have that picture in mind I cannot help but think what if the day really comes? I'm so afraid. Loving someone is by choice. Whether they choose to give up is by choice. I really hope you'll choose me everyday of your life. Regardless of how much you feel like killing me, how much bullshit I give to you and vice versa, we'll continue loving each other, continue choosing each other everyday. 

I slept yesterday with a really horrible dream. Up till now I'm still figuring why I even had that dream in the first place.. (ARGH I WANNA STUDY DREAMS PLEASE ACCEPT ME JAMES COOK UNIVERSITY) 

I dreamt that while I was trying to be happy celebrating my 21st birthday, I was saddened by the fact that I am gonna go overseas to study for 3 fucking years..... So many thoughts came into my mind. He told me he would wait for me. He told me we could video call. He told me a lot of things but those many things were really not enough to make me leave without worrying... 

I think about how he'd spend his weekends without me after booking out. I think about how other girls might attract him in the 3 years I'm away. I think about how he might not control when he drinks. 

Many says sex is not love. But even so I don't want my guy to just have sex with some other girl just to release. And then again I'm being selfish. Because I know scientifically it is human nature to wanna release and not just you know..... Masturbate all the time. I know myself I couldn't do long distance relationship. Not because I couldn't be loyal. But because if I were to have a long distance relationship I wouldn't be able to concentrate in anything that I do. I'd be worrying and being paranoid over so many unnecessary things.. It is indeed unhealthy. Only because humans are wicked and horrible.... I have nothing literally nothing to make anyone stay because of me. I don't know how to handle a break up. Even more a long distance relationship. I can't even handle army sometimes. The attention I need from my boyfriend is so much sometimes I myself find myself too overwhelming. Yet he accepts it graciously, sometimes scolds me but still loves me and tells me it's okay. 

Sobs I was crying hysterically in my dreams it woke me up cuz I choked. 

Then when I think about it now, maybe because I've been seeing him so much lately that i don't bare to part with him... Never in our 1 year 1 month relationship that we've seen each other for so many days. The most was probably less than a week... Like 5 days due to long holidays etc... This time it was 20 fucking days. This withdrawal symptom is real..

My parents will never understand this feeling I have towards him. I know he may not be financially stable right now. But it doesn't mean in the future he wouldn't be stable. Maybe I'm a little stupid to give people many chances considering the shit we've been through but I think right now we're so much better. I just know we will work out. I just know he'll be able to love me and he'll be able to work things out as soon as his obstacles are cleared. I'm not blinded by love. I choose to love him for him. I know the road is tough... But I just want him I really don't want anyone else in my life. Thank you for still choosing me even up till now.

Up till now I'm still trying to understand him. Everyday I'm slowly figuring out how he's like. This will never end. Because the day we stop trying to understand where each other's coming from, that's the day our relationship will start to fall apart again. I love my mr ong and i'll always love him till the end of time!!!!!! 

Very "good" start to the year

Did I mentioned on my previous post how I fell sick on Christmas and New years? I probably did. I currently still am sick but at least I'm not having crazy fever like Dylan is right now. I'm coughing my lungs out and it's killing me but I'm surviving.

Have been attempting to take care of Dylan for the past 2 days because he has been having a tremendously high temperature. I have not taken care of anyone in my entire life before and he's the first. But then i feel so taken for granted yet again. Does he know how worried I am when I see his temperature go up to 39 and above? Does he know how serious it is if it continues going up? I've not been able to like take care of him during the night because I don't stay with him and I can't stay with him. It's not my fault that I can't. If he knew me well he would know If I could I would. But he gets annoyed and angry and then everytime I worry he gets angry. What? I'm not saying I am asking anything in return but at least don't make me feel so taken for granted of. I can't sleep properly because I scared he might text me anytime. Went over to his place today also cannot sleep because I scared his temperature keep going up. I'm so worried about him but he only sees the part where I can't fucking stay over to take care of him. Sorry then.

Meh. Feel like shit. 关心你也被骂. "Behind every angry woman is a guy who doesn't know what he did wrong." Like legit. Always asking me why I'm so angry why i'm so pek. Does he know how shitty i feel when I cannot do anything? I'm trying to like compensate today. Does he see it or does he not?

Meh. I want sleeping pills now so I can knock out.

2016....?

Finally I've gotten my laptop fixed. I feel like I just came back alive after many many months of not using the laptop. Like finally I can freaking use this damn laptop. It's like a fresh start for so many things suddenly. I feel like I'm finally living again.

I can't even comprehend how I feel for 2015. Literally. Every year I'm like "this year sucked balls." but the following year is no better. Rather, it gets worse. I'll explain everything in this post. Relationship, Money, Family, Studies, Life.

Studies

I've done really badly for my last semester of my third year in LASALLE. Up till now I still feel really thoroughly awful. I can't forget the moments I wish to rewind. There were truly many moments. I destroyed my own so called future because I destroyed my own reputation. There could be 3 out of 5 days in a week that I either skip the first class or I just literally skip the whole morning. I'd come out with so many excuses just because I felt like I'm just so unmotivated and felt like the class was so useless for me. Even on show day I skipped my light plot and got caught by my teacher. I never would've thought I'd be one of the people in my class to do such a thing.. To the extent that the people who were close to me just gave up on me. Sometimes treat like I'm not even there. It was really a horrible semester for me... So horrible.. I really should've taken my last semester more seriously sigh.. 

I did felt kinda happy when I graduated because it was really really tiring and torturing for me. Mentally, physically and emotionally. Due to many factors that other people don't know about. But as we all know happiness doesn't last. As soon as I graduated, my mom and dad started pouring future questions to me. What am I gonna do next, am I gonna work or study etc. I told them I just wanted to take a year gap. I'll re apply for arts management next year. From now till then I'll work and maybe just find myself along the way. That's the original plan.  But things changed so much throughout the year. I was just working all the way and just got so annoyed with work. The people there killed me so bad. Moving on to Money.

Money
So my parents stopped giving me allowance ever since I stopped schooling. Obviously I had to find a job. I found one that paid me 1.7 for an admin job. Of course as clueless as I am I just took it because to me 1.7 is quite a lot for a "part time" job. It was a full time job but to me it was not a permanent thing so I called it part time. But because it was full time, it took up my Mondays to fridays and I had no say if I had to OT that day. Hence my life was given to Standard Chartered. I was happy with my pay, but so so sooooo unhappy with the people I had to deal with 5 days in a row for 6 months. Month after month I wanted to quit, but because of the pay I stayed. Because where else can I get 1.7 per month, and not eating up my weekend?! Nowhere... I had so much money troubles. I had to give my parents money if not they'll say I am no filial. I had to make sure I don't spend more than 50 per week so I got enough money to like go dance classes etc. I had to make sure I saved the amount I am supposed to save that month or else I'll freak out. Basically if I have no savings with me and I know my parents aren't gonna give me money, I feel damn insecure. So yeah.. I stuck throughout the 6 months but I gave the last month up. Couldn't tolerate them no more and I had run out of my leave/mcs.... So I just quit.

Family&Relationship
Ever since I got attached, me and my parents have been in a very very terrible situation. Not only because I was attached, also because I had no goal in life and I was practically failing in school.

You know they say you need to trust your instincts because once you feel something there's a 80% chance whatever you're feeling is right. So yeah. Even before I told them I was dating my boyfriend I knew that they would have some sort of bad judgement towards him. I explained how come I chose him and I told them even though he had a bad past, it's all in the past and the current him is so much better. But when I told my parents that, me and Dylan were only in our 3th month of dating and only a few days after we were attached. That's the biggest mistake I've made in my life; introducing him too damn early into the family. I was naive to think I knew Dylan well enough to claim we would be stable. Throughout this entire one year my family has been telling me so many warnings that I chose to ignore. Because I just think I could handle whatever that was gonna come to me and me and my boyfriend would conquer it together. It turned out to be so wrong..

Me and Dylan had way more fights than happy moments on and off. Our fights just kept happening and the reasons were always the same. We just didn't understand where each other was coming from. We don't understand each other's personalities and we don't know why each other is behaving the way they behave. I have my perspective of how a good guy should react when we quarrel. He has his perspective too. After every quarrel we promise to make things better and hopefully if we fight again it'll be better. NOPE. It got worse after every fight. It was so torturing to know the guy I wanted to spend the rest of my life is suddenly might not make it to my future. How could I be living with someone who picks up small fights with me every now and then, gets agitated when I'm trying to talk things out, shuts up when he is supposed to voice out how he's feeling? I was literally going crazy and totally walking into depression. At that point of time I thought only my Taiwan trip with him could resolve the problems within us throughout the entire year. However I was a little bit hesitant about the trip too. What if we fight again? Is he gonna walk out on me? Is he gonna scold me in public? Is he gonna shout even louder at me when I'm having my anxiety attacks? It was so scary for me. Though I still thought it would be a pleasant experience to travel with someone I love. But with so many things happening I didn't know.

My parents made the decision to stop us from going to Taiwan. That has definitely caused a huge hoo-haa between me and Dylan. It took me quite some time to digest why my parents did what they did. And I fought big time with my mother from that day onwards. I was always a person to wanna prove whatever they say wrong. However this time I couldn't. Because whatever they told me about Dylan were all right. Because I experienced it myself first hand, I had nothing else to say. I took it as my parents rejected Dylan as my boyfriend. It wasn't helping me at all. I was giving up on the relationship but I still wanted us to work out. I told myself if i try hard enough he will get where I am coming from. Everyday I'm trying to find ways to make him understand why we're fighting almost every other day. But it still just doesn't work. Without my parents support it was just like a big blow to me. They talked to me about it first and then talked to Dylan after. Obviously Dylan took it the wrong way too, just like me he thought they rejected him as my boyfriend. He thought all his efforts in this relationship has gone to waste. He was just literally seeing all the bad side of things and how they will never ever accept him into the family.

We almost broke up that very day and I got so so so emotional. It was the most dramatic almost break up ever. It was raining so heavily and we were stuck under a huge shelter. It was almost like I was begging him to stay. At that point of time I just felt like the love he had for me was not even there. Because how can he give up so easily on us when all I did was just kept holding on regardless of how I felt towards the relationship? How can he just say we end it here because he THINKS my parents reject him as boyfriend? I just wonder and wonder why is his character so weak. Why couldn't he just buck up and face my parents and just prove to them he is not what he is in my parents eyes. I learnt one sentence from Miss Melissa and it is really true. "You think you're trying very hard and you think you're putting in a lot of effort, but sadly it is not enough and it does not show." That was exactly how I felt. He kept on telling me he put in a lot of effort in trying to salvage the relationship, yet we kept on fighting over the same things and this relationship was literally going nowhere.

It was a very very tiring day for me. Eventually I got him to stay. After 2 almost break ups drama in one damn day. He kept saying "I love you. But your parents caused this." No. No one can ever cause anything. Decisions are made by you. If you choose to leave me, you caused it. Not them. If you think they're the reason, you're just weak because you cannot accept what they're telling you. I felt like my decision to love you was right, regardless of how many people told me I was stupid because of how you handled the bad situations. But I know one day we will work things out. I just know it.

Who knew the saviour of our relationship turned out to be my father.. After everything simmered down by a bit, my father decided to talk things out to Dylan. And suddenly from that day on everything changed.

He was no longer fighting with me over the smallest things. He was always trying to understand from my point of view instead of just thinking he's right. He stopped taking me for granted. He stopped taking the time he have with me for granted. I never say I don't play a part in how he treated me in the past. I apologise for always making situations like he's only the one at fault. I am at fault too because I handled all those situations badly. Always making him feel so flawed when I'm supposed to be accepting it.

Dylan was the main reason why me and my family are so far apart in 2015. The only thing that could solve my problem was that both parties attempt to try and like each other.. Me as the middle person would feel so much easier with so many things. So yea things were finally going my way. My dad is finally comfortable with Dylan after the whole Taiwan drama thingy. It is a blessing in disguise really.  I loved all the things that have happened between me and Dylan after my parents rejected my taiwan trip with him. I feel so much more loved by him in this few weeks compared to the past few months that we've been together. Because now there's so much more understanding towards each other. There's so much more love and happiness towards each other instead of just harping on the negatives and the bad moments. I feel more secure knowing even if we quarrel, we would understand how we got to that point and also knowing he wants to know how I feel.

I am very happy with where I am at with my boyfriend today. And this I have to thank my father for it. Currently, me and my parents are also on good terms already. Suddenly everything just fell into place. And I feel so happy about it.

The next thing that I need to really focus on, is where I need to go in life. I've applied for James Cook Uni in 2016. I just really sincerely hope they will accept me in. Because as much as I hate studying, I really have the interest in knowing behavioural patterns etc. I just have so much interest in psychology. I don't even know why. Like no matter how many people tell me how tough it is, I just feel like I will be able to understand it because I just am pretty more observant when it comes to personalities and people. I'm excited to learn more about it but that can only happen if they freaking accept me!!!!!! Waiting period is only 1 week but it's so damn scary at the same time. Please just accept me in :'(

2016 didn't start that well but I wouldn't say it's bad either. I had a scary pregnancy scare because my period was late for 6 days. Also I've had high fever on the 2 very special occasions; Christmas and New Years. But now all's good. Because finally some reds are flowing out of me, and my fever has subsided...

I thank god for giving me such a strong leap of faith in holding on to my relationship. I know we'll work out. I just know I am willing to walk down this path with him. We may have a 4 year age gap but as long as we have the faith, we will find a way to work our future out together. I'm excited for what's to come. Also thankful for the closest people to my heart for still staying so true to themselves <3

Happy New year :)